I would like to interject here that we may have gone too far in encouraging bears and cubs to become big fat slobs. There's no rule here that says a man has to become clinically obese in order to be a bear. I know plenty of bears who are in incredible shape. But it seems that we are leading our young bears (cubs) astray when it comes to weight. They are now using it as an excuse to refrain from taking care of themselves. This is something we should be discouraging, not the other way around. I see these young guys in their teens and twenties who are just huge, and it is going to have long-lasting effects upon their health and well being. I realize that there are plenty of guys out there who are attracted to this sort of thing, but please, guys. Let's be realistic about it. No one benefits from being over weight. Quite the opposite is true. We need to be urging our young men to keep themselves fit and happy.
posted by:
|
-
Re: The cult of the cub/bear
Thu, November 17, 2005 - 1:36 PMWell, you may have a point, and you may not. Being a bear or cub has its very roots in acceptance. Bears in the early days were all about the attitude - fat, thin, beard, goatee - whatever. Some of our "young cubs" may have a lot more going on in their lives than just an eating problem kicked into play by Happy Meals and Snickers bars. Emotions, mental health, environment, physiology. Their are many factors leading to obesity. The bear and/or cub communities should be a non-threatening space for acceptance where guys can feel good about themselves regardless of the way they look, exercise or fill out a pair of jeans. Perhaps you need to adjust your focus. I for one would not recommend suggesting that an entire community - and that IS what we are discussing - change their lives in order to conform. Yes, health is paramount in any life. But we need to be compassionate and understanding on the road to Wellville. Some may not want to change, others will. And for those guys who get turned on by a beer gut or hefty daddy bear...welcome to the human race. -
-
Re: The cult of the cub/bear
Thu, November 17, 2005 - 5:22 PMHmmm...Perhaps I do not need to adjust my focus at all. I never once said we should not accept someone for any reason. I'm suggesting that we stop encouraging young men to eat themselves into a coma just to fit in. As for being a non-threatening space where everyone is happy and content, etc., that place only exists inside the minds of the politically correct. -
-
Re: The cult of the cub/bear
Fri, November 18, 2005 - 11:57 AMNow really. How many guys have you met that actually try to "eat themselves into a coma" just to fit in? Where does THAT place exist?
There are guys with fetishes on the fringe that claim to actually enjoy bulking - but again, they will continue to find community. To ask them to change seems a titch PC to me. Next stop? Smokers, drinkers, drug users, barebackers, extreme sport jocks...drivers without seatbelts.
Most cubs in the "cub" community are guys owning their image and sexuality and looking to build a little pride along the way. More power...
-
-
Re: The cult of the cub/bear
Fri, November 18, 2005 - 4:41 PM"Owning". There's some great new-speak. Anyway, the war is already on against smokers, drinkers, barebackers, etc.. And of course no one actually literally eats oneself into a coma. One can over-state something in order to make a point. The point has been lost now, though. Never mind. Live fat and prosper. -
-
Unsu...
Re: The cult of the cub/bear
Fri, November 18, 2005 - 6:42 PMStop it boys or I'm coming upstairs! -
-
Re: The cult of the cub/bear
Sat, November 19, 2005 - 12:09 AMSorry Dad......But he started it!
-
-
Re: The cult of the cub/bear
Sun, March 19, 2006 - 5:01 PMJust to "toss my 2 cents" in here-
I have all 42 years of my life had a weight problem. As I never fit in with the little "cutie-pies" on the disco floors, I lived in San Francisco and felt left out in the crowd of cast offs- to be FAT was viewed to be in the same class as drugies, trolls, and what have you's! "UNDESIREABLE" comes to mind. After a Skin-head attack in the late 90's in S.F, I spent 4 years in a wheel chair, pumped with all kinds of perscriptions that pushed to ALMOST, but never HITTING, the 400 pound mark- I have managed to get out of the Chair and have lost over 125 lbs. but it is funny that the stigma of being a FATTY is still there- In the Bear/Cub community. After posting some pics on a meeting site, on the same day I was rebuffed because I was "WAY TO FAT-GET a LIFE" and "You have lost too much weight- No thank you!" All I did was say "Hello, Great smile!" Is THIS what we have really become? When I discovered the Bear Community I was so glad to think I found a place that "I" would fit in- and HAVE in some places but are we all STILL that obsessed with what is on the outside? It seems sad to me- Just rambleing! -
-
Re: The cult of the cub/bear
Sun, March 26, 2006 - 12:19 PMI get tired of the duality of the cub/bear culture. what ever happened to the community that started this movement. take a look at the first 25 issues of bear mag sometime! in the bear community now they would not have been in this type of mag. I see what many call bears nowadays and wonder are they bears or just hairy muscle/porn stars. who found a niche. I have always liked my men BIG not just fat but bulkly. now you approach so many in the community and if you are too big for there tastes it might as well be the disco twinkies of the 80's 90's and I am tired of it..
as for you pookie I say good for you to have come back from such a beating. I am glad to hear you re out of the chair and if you are big so be it. -
-
Re: The cult of the cub/bear
Sun, March 26, 2006 - 5:06 PMI will tell you this much. I like men with meat on their bones, but when they can not see their dick, or by the same token when they go to sleep at night and they cannot breathe when they lay down, there is a problem. There are ver y handsome big me, but obese and bears are tnt the same. Still they are accepted in the commuity and they should feel welcome everywhere. Just be aware of your health, if you weight causes you health problems wether you are sknny or not so skinny that should be the guide for you to know that you are in an unhealthy weight range. Sleep Apnea is a good indication of excessive weight. Take good care of yourselves
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
Re: The cult of the cub/bear
Thu, December 15, 2005 - 3:47 PM(Sorry to come in so late in the conversation, just joined the tribe.)
Good points made on both sides of the discussion, and I do agree with some points on either side.
At one point we do need to be all inclusive regardless of size etc.. BUT also if not encouraging of a healthier lifestyle, not encouraging of a intentionally eat more+ get bigger=sexier/more acceptance type thing. (And those are extreme examples). As we all know, some young minds are very impressionalble and actually go out of their way to get bigger in hopes of "fitting in " better within the community that is so accepting of bigger guys. Yet, some guys are just naturally bigger, and should continue to feel comfortable be it in the bear/cub community or any friggin' community, they all have cliques, straight or gay...
Where does one find a happy medium? That's the tricky part, if we can encourage guys (of any age/size) to just be themselves, that's a good start. Once one can be comfortable in their OWN shoes, they will more easily be able to find a balance in whatever they do.
How's that for a wishy washy response...
